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Back To The Freeform Cinematic Universe (with The Fosters!)

Hi everyone! Did you catch me on the latest episode of That’s Entertaining yet? If not, check it out here. Alright, enough chit chat, it’s time to go back to my favorite cinematic universe, the Freeform Cinematic Universe!

So everyone’s seen Avengers: Endgame and knows who the real hero of the Marvel Cinematic Universe is, right? Wait who said Iron Man? Wrong! The Hulk? Pfft, whatever! Ant-Man? You’re slightly closer but still totally incorrect! It’s your girl Mona Vanderwaal from Pretty Little Liars! If you’ll recall a few months back, I wrote how Mona gets the Infinity Gauntlet from Thanos by thoroughly frustrating him with the Liars Lament board game. What I didn’t mention then (but did briefly mention on the Avengers: Endgame episode of That’s Entertaining) is how she did it in context of the movie. Growing bored with unlimited power, Mona ends the game by first willing the Water Stone out of existence, which is why Thanos destroyed the Gauntlet at the beginning of Endgame (recognizing a trait she and Thanos share, she realizes no more stones to find will lead to no more temptation to use the Gauntlet again). Then with the remaining power of the rest of the stones, Mona resets the timeline, making sure to put the rat that freed Ant-Man from the Quantum Realm where it needed to be to do so. YOU’RE WELCOME EVERYONE! But even the G.O.A.T. needs some help along the way, and Mona got that hep from the rest of the Freeform Cinematic Universe! This month I’ll be looking at the role The Fosters played in the fight against Thanos!

So a little bit of background on The Fosters if you’re unfamiliar. I didn’t watch it during it’s initial run, my first exposure to it came via it’s spin-off show Good Trouble, which I watched for the TV podcast I co-host (like share subscribe and leave a comment here please!). I liked Good Trouble so much it made me want to watch The Fosters, so I made that my summer watch (previous summer shows of mine were Pretty Little Liars and Gilmore Girls). I finished Fosters in record time, which led to this article. Y’all I can’t recommend The Fosters highly enough! It’s a wonderful show that explores so many important issues like foster care and immigration, and they were well ahead of the game regarding the positive light they shed on the LGBTQ community. They did all this and so much more and did so with a lot of heart and tons of laughs along the way! Hopefully Fosters fans will appreciate the rest of this article and it will make sense even if you haven’t seen The Fosters, and bonus points and much love if you end up watching the show because of this article. If you do watch the show, one of the many things you’ll learn about (slight spoiler alert) the Adams Fosters is that they aren’t going to take half of life of the universe being wiped out lying down, and that even though they’ll all tell each other not to get involved they totally will anyway. So here’s how the Adams-Fosters fared in the Freeform Cinematic Universe’s fight against Thanos!

This first bit was inspired awhile back by my partner in podcast Chris Rider:

Jesus Adams Foster and Jude Adams Foster were victims of “the snap” – AKA “the blip” (although Jude might just have been at Connor’s the whole time, who really knows? If you binge watch The Fosters and take a shot every time Jude ISN’T in an episode you’d be hammered pretty quickly.). This instantly prompts former police officer (later detective) turned social worker Stef Adams Foster back into action – despite the objections of her wife Lena. While out investigating, Stef comes across an outnumbered Black Widow fighting against Thanos’s soldiers. With Stef’s help they manage to fight off the soldiers, but Black Widow is injured in the battle. Stef takes her back to her home, where her and Lena nurse her back to health. During her recovery Black Widow finds the family she never had growing up and bonds with Stef and Lina. Once Black Widow has recovered, she rejoins the final battle against Thanos, and Stef insists on joining as well. Black Widow and Lena object, but Stef won’t take no for an answer. During the battle, Thanos can’t help but feel the love Stef has for Lena via the Mind Stone, so he uses the Space Stone to transport Lena to the battlefield and starts to wipe her from existence in front of Stef and Black Widow. Black Widow sacrifices herself to save Lena, but just before she dies Stef and Lena adopt her, making her Natasha Romanoff Adams Foster. The loss of Black Widow leaves Stef too devastated to continue to fight until Callie Adams Foster later joins the battle.

Brandon Adams Foster is the first of two Adams Foster children to attempt to take out Thanos in an individual attack. Brandon has picked up a gig playing piano for everyone’s favorite mutant musician, Dazzler! After “the snap”, Dazzler is unaware who exactly is left to take on Thanos. Realizing it may just be her, she decides to do whatever she can to try and stop him. Brandon refuses to let her go alone, having figured out she’s a mutant and noting that she’s more powerful with the more sound she has access to. Knowing she can’t convince Brandon otherwise, she allows him to come. They find Thanos and launch an attack. Brandon sets up the mother of all sound systems and plays his piano, making Dazzler the most powerful she’s been since Galactus once called upon her. Dazzler manages to blind Thanos with her light, then nearly takes him out with her most powerful photon laser blasts. A desperate Thanos uses the Reality Stone to access our reality (yes, the one you and I reside in) and brings in arguably the most deadly weapon of all – lawyers! He brings lawyers from Fox and lawyers from Disney to the battle and pits them against each other. The lawyers quickly assess the situation and instantly go for the legal jugular, raising such heated questions as “is the Fox-Disney deal complete”, “when exactly will the X-Men and the Fantastic Four appear in the MCU”, “who has the rights to Dazzler”, and “can she be taking place in this battle?” The only thing the lawyers can agree upon is that Dazzler needs to immediately cease and desist her attack, which she reluctantly does. Thanos teleports away, leaving Brandon to brood about their near victory.

Mariana Adams Foster, upset over the loss of her twin brother Jesus, makes it her own personal mission to take down Thanos (and when Mariana sets her mind on something you’d better look out!). She uses her brilliant coding skills coupled with her time on the STEAM team to build M.O.D.O.K. (Mariana’s Only Don’t OK). Even with the power of the Mind Stone behind him, Thanos struggles to find a way to match the magnificent mental might of M.O.D.O.K.! Unfortunately, Mariana accidentally gave M.O.D.O.K. a bit too much of her “miss thang” zest, and M.O.D.O.K. suddenly quits the battle and refuses to continue until he’s allowed to join the dance team and dye his hair blonde. Mariana argues that his hair’s just fine the way it is and that his legs are too short to be on a dance team. As they continue to bicker, Thanos uses the distraction to escape. Speaking of escape, M.O.D.O.K. is able to see through the reality reset Mona later does thanks to his mental prowess and not only survives it but is currently at large in the Marvel/Freeform Cinematic Universe.

The last Adams Foster child to join the battle is Callie. Due to the events of Good Trouble, she finds herself needing a change of scenery and moves to New York City. In New York, she passes the bar and comes across the law firm of her dreams, Nelson & Murdock. Callie interviews with Matt Murdock. During the interview, Matt notices Callie’s unwavering truth and fiercely strong conviction with his heightened senses and not only hires her, but makes her a partner as well, making the law firm Nelson Murdock & Adams Foster – without telling Foggy! Foggy is rightfully angry about this (though he notes this is “classic Matt”), but once he sees Callie in action he knows Matt made the right call. Then “the snap” happens. A horrified Callie notes that there has to be something they can do, and in light of the situation Matt reveals his secret identity as Daredevil. Daredevil congregates the rest of The Defenders – Luke Cage, Jessica Jones, and Iron Fist – along with Colleen Wing and Misty Knight as well. Callie then gets a call from a devastated Lena and is able to surmise that they’re somehow at the final battle. Callie gets the whereabouts of the fight and insists on coming. There’s no time to argue so they bring her. Daredevil gives Callie a “in case of emergency” bazooka the Punisher left him for Callie to use, and Iron Fist trains Callie in the Martial Arts of K’un Lun. They join the fight when a cavalry is desperately needed and are almost enough to win the day, but ultimately the might of the Infinity Gauntlet is just too much for them to handle (cue Mona and Liars Lament).

This may just be the craziest thing I’ve ever written, and I once dated a log! If you like this please share it on social media and/or wherever else you could, and if you want to give me a follow on social media that’d be cool too. Thanks very much and I’ll catch you next time!

Steve Waldinger
I write comedy & comics! See also where I co-create live improvised comics, &, the podcast I co-host! Find me on Twitter and Instagram - @stevewaldinger

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